"That was beautiful you two!" Rachel declared. Ciara opened her eyes, realized what had just happened and blushed.
"I'm sorry, I get so lost in that song." She apologized.
"Never apologize for singing like that." Brian said.
"Like what?" she asked.
"With such passion and emotion." Kevin stated.
"It's the song…" Ciara blushed.
"No… there's more behind it. Anyone can sing a great song, but to put as much heart and passion and emotion behind it takes someone special. That was amazing." Howie was in pure awe.
"Ciara, he's right. You've got a great voice." AJ commented.
"Thanks, guys, but please, can you just stop with the compliments? I'm not enjoying this." Ciara said. She was shaking. Rachel was the only one that knew the true meaning behind why she wanted to hear that song. Rachel had just got caught up in the moment and forgotten about it.
"Well, ya know what I want to hear?" Brian asked.
"What?" Ciara replied.
"How did you know you wanted to become a writer? And Rachel, you a nurse?" Brian asked.
Rachel and Ciara each looked at each other. As they explained how they decided what they wanted to do and why and how they came to their decisions, Brian realized how beautiful Rachel was. He began daydreaming.

"Brian… yo! Brian!" Everyone snapped Brian out of his daydream.
"Huh?" Brian blushed.
"C'mon… we're shopping on 5th avenue!" Rachel said and grabbed his hand to pull him out of the limousine.
Brian chuckled as he was flung into the group.
"What's so funny?"
"I was literally thrown out of my daydream and into reality by a gorgeous woman! If that isn't heaven, than what is?" Brian questioned the guys. Rachel blushed.
"Okay… let's shop." Nick said. Nick, Howie, Kevin, Brian, Rachel, AJ, and Ciara spent the next several hours going in and out of stores on 5th Avenue, shopping and laughing and getting to know each other. While the girls were trying on clothes in one of the shops, AJ ran over to a jewelry store and had a locket inscribed for Ciara. He was going to ask her to dinner, just the two of them.

"Wow… I think we've bought enough to fill up several limousines!" Brian declared when they had all decided they were done. It was nearly six in the evening.
"And then some." Ciara laughed.
"So what about dinner and clubbing tonight?" Kevin suggested. Everyone agreed except for AJ.
"I was hoping that I could have some one on one time with Ciara." He said as his cell phone rang. "Excuse me." He answered his phone.
"AJ, it's your mother. I'm at the hotel. Where are you?"
"Mom, what are you doing in town?"
"I came to see you and Ciara. Now… where are you? I know you two have a lot of questions and well, I think it's time you knew the truth." His mother replied.
"Not tonight mom. Please." AJ stated. "You came up here for nothing mom. I'm in the middle of a date." AJ stated.
"Oh… okay… well, can we meet for breakfast then?"
"Fine momma. We'll meet you for breakfast." AJ sighed. He didn't want interference from either family right now. He wanted to get Ciara feeling totally at ease and comfortable around him.
"AJ, why are you hiding me from your mother?" Ciara asked.
"I'm not hiding you from her. I just don't want her to ruin our fun. Is that alright?" AJ shrugged.
"Okay, okay and as for the one-on-one time… that's all right too." Ciara said in front of everyone.
Brian had gotten up the nerve to ask Rachel to go out to dinner with him, leaving Nick, Kevin, and Howie to fend for themselves.

"There's this little, family-owned Italian place in Little Italy that I'd love to take you to." AJ said as he met her at her hotel room two hours later. He was in a casual, Miami-vice look, dressed in jeans and tight-fitting beige short sleeve shirt and tan sports jacket.
Ciara had just opened the door to see him standing there with his pinstriped beard looking as handsome as ever. She was speechless.
"C… you okay?" he asked. Rachel had come over to see what Ciara was gaping at.
"AJ… you're looking mighty handsome tonight. Ciara's just a little taken aback." Rachel giggled as she patted Ciara on the back.
"What she said." Ciara admitted. AJ produced a single white rose from behind his back.
"My turn to admire you, Ciara." He said as he handed her the rose. Ciara was dressed in a simple berry colored and floral dress with a white lace sweater. Her hair was swept back in a loose braid and she was wearing a cross necklace and simple hoop earrings. "You look absolutely lovely this evening. The car is waiting. Shall we go?" AJ asked.
"Rachel… don't wait up." Ciara declared as she left with AJ.

"Not long." Brian replied.
"Did you convince her to stay?" Rachel asked as she had walked in front of the guys to face AJ.
"I think so… She's splashing some water on her face. She'll be out in a few minutes.
"Once she comes out, what's the plan?" Howie asked.
"Shopping and the more the better." AJ said. Everyone laughed.

"Okay, Ciara. You can do this. You're a big girl and nothing is going to hurt you." Ciara said to herself as she splashed some water on her face.

"Why don't I go see what's taking her so long?" Rachel suggested after a few minutes. Everyone had gone into the hotel room. Rachel didn't wait for the guys to answer her, but instead, went over to the bathroom door and knocked on it. "Ciara?"
"Hey, Rach… ready for some shopping?" Ciara asked as she opened the door.
"Yeah, are you?" Rachel looked for any signs that Ciara was down.
"Yeah, but please, if I seem a little off, don't worry about me, alright?" Ciara asked.
"Alright. C'mon… we're keeping five gorgeous gentleman waiting." Rachel giggled. Ciara couldn't help but join in.

First stop was FAO Schwartz. They were all fortunate enough that there weren't many people in the store when they arrived so the manager closed the store for an hour for them to roam and have a good time.

"Oh my gosh, AJ remember how we'd watch the Smurfs together on Saturday mornings. How you'd run over to my house at the crack of dawn?" Ciara said as they found the Smurfs section.
"You'd be Smurfette all the time and I would always be one of the other smurfs…" AJ cut in.
"Except for Papa Smurf. And we made our moms search for smurf costumes for Halloween?" Ciara was remembering her childhood and loving it. The tears that were falling were happy tears.
"Remember the time we thought that if we drank the blue kool-aid mix, we'd turn into smurfs?" AJ laughed.
"And how we'd only eat the blue fruity loops!" they were both laughing. One by one, the rest of the Backstreet Boys and Rachel followed the laughter to the Smurf section. AJ and Ciara had found a larger-than-life-sized Papa smurf and were sitting down in front of it, reminiscing about their smurf memories. Rachel snapped a few pictures before Ciara and AJ realized they were being watched.
"Um… Hi?" Ciara said to the gang.
"So this is where you two got to? We were beginning to wonder." Howie told them.
"Yeah… just having some fun. What do you say we go do some more shopping elsewhere?" AJ suggested as he helped Ciara up.
"Sure… I'm up for it." Ciara suggested as her stomach growled. "Um, but I should have something to eat first." She giggled.
"That's right, you didn't really eat anything at breakfast." Rachel noted.
"McDonald's still your favorite fast food?" AJ asked.
"You know it! Killer French fries!" she replied.
"You heard the lady, let's go find a Mickey D's." AJ told the group. They each thanked the store manager as they each bought a few toys from the store and then got into the limousine."

"Okay, can we get you guys to sing something?" Ciara asked as everyone was finishing up their food from McDonald's while sitting in the parked limousine.
"Sure, what do you want to hear?"
"Anywhere For You?" Ciara asked. "I've always loved that song." She explained.
"Oh wow… we haven't sung that in ages. Everyone remember it?" Kevin asked the guys.
"I'll start it off for you." Ciara suggested and began to sing the song for them. They were so impressed at her boldness, the only one to join in was AJ. Ciara had closed her eyes and was imagining that she was sitting at home listening to the CD and singing along with it.

I'd go anywhere for you
Anywhere you asked me to
I'd do anything for you
Anything you want me to

I'd walk halfway around the world
For just one kiss from you
Far beyond the call of love
The sun, the stars, the moon
As long as your love's there to lead me
I won't lose my way, believe me
Even through the darkest night you know

I'd go anywhere for you
Anywhere you asked me to
I'd do anything for you
Anything you want me to
You love as far as I can see
Is all I'm ever gonna need
There's one thing for sure
I know it's true
Baby, I'd go anywhere for you

I used to think that dreams were just
For sentimental fools
And 'd never find someone
Who'd give their love so true
But I knew the very minute
Couldn't live my life without you in it
And now I want the whole wide world
To know

I'd go anywhere for you
Anywhere you asked me to
I'd do anything for you
Anything you want me to
You love as far as I can see
Is all I'm ever gonna need
There's one thing for sure
I know it's true
Baby, I'd go anywhere for you

Hey baby, hey baby, hey baby, oohhh
Hey baby, hey baby, hey baby, oohhh
Hey baby, hey baby, hey baby, oohhh
I'd go anywhere for you
Anywhere you asked me to
I'd do anything for you
Anything you want me to
You love as far as I can see
Is all I'm ever gonna need
There's one thing for sure
I know it's true
Baby, I'd go anywhere for you

I'd go anywhere for you
Anywhere you asked me to
I'd do anything for you
Anything you want me to
You love as far as I can see
Is all I'm ever gonna need
There's one thing for sure
I know it's true
Baby, I'd go anywhere for you

"This next song is dedicated to two new friends, yet one of them is an old friend to one of us. This is their favorite song and we haven't sung it on this tour yet." Howie announced when the guys came back out for the encore. The guys sang "Perfect Fan" for Rachel and Ciara. They went nuts.

"So… what did you think for your first Backstreet Boys concert?" the guys asked Ciara and Rachel when the girls finally got backstage after the show.
"Fabulous!" Ciara replied.
"Can't wait for the next one." Rachel added. They all laughed.
"Now that it's over, I wish it wasn't. What's next on the agenda?" Ciara asked.
"We have to talk to MTV for a few minutes, but then we'll board the bus and head back to the hotel for the evening." Brian explained.
"Sounds good to us, right Ciara?" Rachel asked.
"Sure." Ciara replied.

After the interview with MTV to explain why another winner would be chosen, everyone boarded limousines and headed back to the hotel they would be staying at.

"Okay Ciara… how are you… really?" Rachel asked when they had a few minutes alone in their hotel room.
"Still processing everything. It's such a relief to finally have my memories back. All of them." Ciara said. The girls sat down on the beds to gab.
"So, what's the deal with you and AJ? What went on between you two all those years ago?" Rachel asked.
"We were friends. We really liked each other a lot and hung out constantly with each other. Even at fourteen we still had sleepovers and we did homework together and watched cartoons and movies together. That summer, we were inseparable. My parents both had to work so instead of shipping me off to a summer camp or forcing Jarod to keep an eye on me, AJ's mom would make sure I had a decent lunch and that I stayed out of trouble. On the weekends when my family would do things together, we'd take AJ and his mom along with us. They were part of the family. A huge part of the family. I don't understand why my mom and his mom lied to him about me after the accident." Ciara said, staring off to space for a moment.
There was a knock on the door.
"Who is it?" Rachel asked.
"AJ and Kevin." AJ said. Rachel answered the door.
"Hi! We were wondering if you two wanted to grab something to eat?" Kevin grinned at Rachel.
"Did I hear food? I'm famished!" Ciara declared from the bed.
"We're in." Rachel was in agreement.
"Great!" the guys said as the girls each grabbed a jacket and left with the guys.

"Rachel, how about a dance with me?" Kevin asked after they all placed their orders. They had gone down to the hotel restaurant. Kevin offered Rachel his hand as he asked her. She accepted. They left AJ and Ciara alone.
"So Ciara… I need to know. What happened to you all those years ago?" AJ asked.
"I was in a coma for six months. They weren't sure I was going to make it. I had to learn how to speak again and things were rough for awhile… physical therapy was a bitch, but that's what got me writing. My mom said I would write for hours after therapy. About a year later, we moved up to Connecticut and mom married this great guy. I had a step-brother and have a step-sister and then a two half-brothers who are going to be ten this summer."
"Wow." Was all AJ could think of to say.
"AJ?" Ciara asked.
"Yeah?"
"I'm sorry our parents lied to you. They shouldn't have done that." Ciara said.
"What's done is done, we can't relive the past." AJ stated.
"Are you as overwhelmed as I am?" Ciara said.
"I don't think nearly as much as you are. You have fourteen years of memories that came back to you in a split second today. I'm surprised you haven't passed out from overload yet." AJ told her.
"I'm happy that I found my bestest friend again, AJ. I couldn't ask for more than that." Ciara told him. Tears welled up in her eyes.
"What's wrong?" AJ immediately asked.
"I finally remember my daddy. I have these remembrances of playing with him and sharing my homework with him. Of all of us fishing and the last one in the car. Remember what he said to Jarod after the car stopped rolling?"
"Ciara… don't do this right now… your dad wouldn't want you to do this." AJ tried to calm her down. He looked for Kevin and signaled that he and Ciara were going to leave. AJ led her back to her hotel room; sat them both down on the couch and let her cry. She cried herself to sleep, nestled in AJ's arms (WOOHOO ß Sorry… author has temporary melt down of being in AJ's arms!).
When Rachel and Kevin returned to the room, both AJ and Ciara were asleep on the couch.
"No… don't wake them. Just leave a note for them explaining that you're sleeping in AJ's room and I'll cover them with a blanket." Kevin whispered as Rachel was about to go over to them. She nodded in agreement to what Kevin had suggested.

Early the next morning, Ciara was dreaming as she lay next to AJ on the couch.
"Jarod, you take care of your mom and your sister now. Be strong and remember I love you all."
"Daddy no!!!!!!!!!! No… Daddy………. Noooooooooooo!"
"NOOOOOOOOO!" Ciara screamed herself awake.
"Angel eyes… you're alright… you're all right." AJ was awakened by her screaming. It took Ciara a few minutes to catch her bearings and realize where she was.
"I'm sorry I woke you AJ."
"It's alright… what has you so shaken?"
"The last words that I remember my father ever speaking." She cried.
"Ssshhhhhhhhh… everything's alright…" AJ said and pulled her into an embrace.
"He died right there in the car. Right there in front of us, AJ. How can you say everything's alright?" Ciara asked.
"Because we were very fortunate to be with him when he died. Don't get me wrong, Ciara. It was a terrible way for your dad to die, but the last visions he saw were of his family, the last words he got to say were of love. God gave him that one last gift before he died to share it with all of us. I wish I could bring him back and I wish you didn't have to go through this, but I can't. All I can do is hold you and support you and be your friend." AJ told her, wishing that they could become more than friends.
"Why did he have to die, AJ? Why?" Ciara cried.
"To send us on a journey maybe? All I know is that I have you back now and that's all that matters. You and me, the way it should be." AJ commented.
"I'm sorry AJ, I'm sorry I'm so emotional… it's just all these memories are here now and…"
"And they're filling in the pieces and allowing you to grieve for your dad finally. It's alright. All I can do is be here to help you through it." AJ replied as he handed her a tissue.
There was a knock at the door. Rachel and Kevin came in.
"Good morning you two." Rachel said.
"Hey!" Ciara was wiping the tears from her face as she answered.
"You two were sound asleep when we got back last night so I stayed in AJ's room." Rachel explained. Kevin grinned.
"Uh oh… Kevin…" AJ warned.
"Nothing happened. Honest!" Kevin replied.
"He's right, guys. He was the perfect gentleman. Walked me to my door and everything." Rachel laughed.
"He usually is. I should go get cleaned up. C… you okay?" AJ asked as he stood up from the couch.
"Yeah, thanks AJ."
"We'll see you both downstairs in the restaurant for breakfast in say thirty minutes?" Kevin asked.
"Better make it an hour. We girls need to primp." Rachel said. Ciara laughed.
"She's right… we'll be down as soon as we can though." The girls walked Kevin and AJ to the door.

"So, AJ. How is she? Rachel was a little worried about her last night." Kevin stated.
"Emotional, which I think is understandable, but she's managing alright."
"And you?" Kevin was worried about his friend.
"I'm good. I do need to call my mom though. She needs to know that I know that Ciara is alive." AJ said.
"Aren't you angry with your mom for lying to you?" Kevin asked.
"She's my mom. She probably thought that she was doing what was best for me at the time. I'm upset about it, but I'm not going to be angry at my mom about it." AJ admitted.
"Good for you. Well, I'm going to go check on the other guys. See you downstairs?" Kevin asked when they reached AJ's hotel room.
"You bet…" AJ said.

"So… tell me all about Kevin." Ciara asked Rachel as soon as they closed the door behind the guys.
"What's there to tell except that he's a great dancer and a magnificent kisser?" Rachel asked as she passed Ciara on her way to the shower, leaving Ciara to gape in astonishment.

"Jarod? It's Ciara…" Ciara had called her brother's house.
"Sorry… we were outside washing the cars. What's up? Everything okay?" Jarod asked his sister.
"Yeah, I just wanted to thank you for following daddy's wishes and watching over me and momma." Ciara replied.
"I would do anything for you. You're my baby sister." Jarod explained.
"I know, but you also sacrificed a lot those first two years after the accident."
"Sis, I love you and I would do it all again. Now, tell me… everything okay with you? How's AJ?" Jarod asked.
"He's amazing. It's as if all these years were just a day since we saw each other last."
"So everything's okay then. You don't need me to come down there for you?"
"No, I'm fine. Honest. I just wanted to call and thank you." Ciara said. She felt much better now that she had made that call.
"Anything for you. Remember that. See you when you get back." Jarod said and hung up the phone.

"Mom… pick up the phone." AJ said into his cell phone. He had just gotten out of the shower and was trying to get a hold of his mom.
"I'm here son. How are you? You sound upset." She stated.
"I am a little. Mom, how could you lie to me all these years about Ciara?" AJ asked.
"Lie to you? What do you mean?"
"Mom, Ciara's alive and well and on the floor below me in this hotel in New York." AJ told her.
"I'm coming up there. I'll be on the next flight. We should talk about this in person." His mom said before hanging up the phone.

"Ladies, you look great!" Brian said when the girls joined him and the rest of the guys in the restaurant.
"Good morning everyone." Ciara and Rachel replied.
"And what's on the agenda today, Howie?" Nick asked as everyone ordered drinks from the waitress.
"Shopping spree day." Howie smiled.
"What shopping spree?" Ciara and Rachel looked at the guys.
"Oh, you didn't know? As winner of the contest, you get a shopping spree with us." AJ said.
"AJ… we can't accept that." Rachel said, shocking both Ciara and herself.
"Pshaw… don't worry about it. Let's go have fun and spend some money!" AJ replied.
"In case you don't know… AJ loves to shop." Nick commented.
"Some things never change." Ciara laughed.
"He was like this back then?" Howie questioned.
"Yup… he was a maniac when we went shopping. But he always had great fashion sense." Ciara explained.
"Had? Had… I still got it babe." AJ commented.
"Oy vey!" Kevin said and slapped his forehead. Everyone laughed.
"Okay, I've been thinking and I have another question for you guys." Rachel asked.
"Shoot." Brian replied.
"What was it like when you guys spent two weeks away from everyone to write?" Rachel asked.
"It was one of the best experiences of my life, I believe." Howie said, "We learned new things about each other and we bonded even more."
"He's right… the only hard part was being away from family." Nick said.
"And home cooking." Brian commented.
"How many songs did you write during those two weeks?" Ciara asked.
"Well, we completed eight but came away with about a dozen others that were semi-completed." AJ said.
"C'mon Ciara… let's get the car packed. Time to go home." Ciara heard her father's voice as AJ was talking. She gripped the table. The voice was so intense. Rachel AJ looked over at her.
"C?"
"Um, excuse me for a minute?" Ciara stood up and went to the ladies room. The guys all looked at Rachel.
"Excuse me, I'm going to go check on her." Rachel replied and immediately went after her.
"Ciara? Are you alright?" Rachel asked as soon as she got to the bathroom. Ciara wasn't in there. Rachel ran back out to the table.
"What's wrong?" AJ immediately asked.
"She's not in the bathroom." Rachel said.
"Rachel, call up to the room. Nick, go check with the front desk if they've seen her. Brian and Howie go question the doorman." AJ barked out orders.
"Calm down AJ." Kevin said.
"I just found her after nearly twelve years without her. I won't lose her again, excuse me, I'm going up to the room." AJ stated and left everyone standing there.
"Ouch!" Ciara exclaimed as she and AJ collided.
"Excuse… Ciara! Where did you go? Rachel said you weren't in the bathroom." AJ declared as he helped her back up.
"Um, I had to, uh, um." Ciara turned bright red. "It's a woman thing, AJ." She couldn't tell him that she had to get tampons from the little guest shop.
"Ohhhhhhhh, Ohhhhhhhhhhhh… I get it, I understand." AJ was embarrassed for them both.
"What did you guys do? Form a posse or something?" Ciara asked.
"Yeah… Rachel went after you and came back and said you weren't in there. I… I… I'm not about to lose you again, C… not again." AJ admitted.
"McLean… this is too much for me to deal with right now… our lives went in different directions that day." Ciara had made a decision.
"What are you saying Ciara?" AJ didn't like the sound of things.
"I need to talk with Rachel and then, then I'm going to go home." Ciara had taken a deep breath before telling him.
"Please… please don't…" they were interrupted by Kevin and Brian and Rachel.
"You found her!" Rachel exclaimed as she gave Ciara a hug.
"Don't what?" Brian and Kevin asked.
"I need to go home. I need to deal with all of this and the sooner the better." Ciara explained.
"It can wait a few days, can't it? You deserve this fun as much as I do, Ciara. Please." Rachel begged.
"It's not fair to all of you when I zone out every few seconds while talking. It's not fair to any of us. I wasn't the one who lied to AJ and told him I was dead. I've been living the pas twelve years without memory of the first fourteen. I need to process all of this. I need time." Ciara said and headed for the elevators. Rachel went to follow, but Nick stopped her. He and Howie were behind the guys.
"Let me go. I'm the least one she'd expect to follow." Nick told them and went after her.

Nick got into the elevator with her and shielded her from the eyes of the others that were on the elevator. He leaned over and whispered in her ear, "It's alright. I just don't want you to be alone." Ciara leaned into him and cried into his chest. When they got off the elevator, Nick led her to her hotel room.
"Ciara, please, AJ needs you right now as much as you need him. Don't go." Nick pleaded with her.
"I'm not the person I was when I was fourteen years old. That's how AJ remembers his `Angel Eyes'. Nick, you don't know anything about me or when AJ and I was fourteen."
"Really?" Nick was angry. "Let me enlighten you on a few things about being fourteen years old and AJ." Nick took away the clothing Ciara was attempting to through into a suitcase and pointed her to a chair.
"I came into this group as a fourteen year old little boy. AJ and the guys took me under their wing and tried to make my teenage years as normal as possible. However, one night when I was really feeling down and moody about not being a normal teenager, AJ took me aside and talked to me about his early teen years. He is one of the men in my life that I look up to with nothing but respect and awe. He, like you, went through hell back then. He believed he lost his best friend in the whole world when he was told you were dead. That's not easy for anyone to endure, especially an impressionable teen. You can't just come back into his life and back out because you can't deal with it. You have to deal, for AJ as well as for yourself. Don't shut him and us out. Don't do it." Nick stated. AJ barged through the door.
"Carter, lay off!" AJ said as he placed himself between Nick and Ciara.
"Wait, AJ… he's right." Ciara exclaimed. Shocking both AJ and Nick.
"Ciara, let's work this out together, please!" AJ begged.
"I need to go home to my mom first. I need to get some answers from her." She explained.
"Then let me go with you. Surely she'll give us both the answers we seek." AJ continued to convince Ciara to let him go with her. Nick had left them in the hotel room alone.
"I don't know, McLean…" Ciara began to pace. AJ gave her some space by backing off and standing next to a window. When he could take no more, he went over to her and kissed her, taking her breadth away.
"I've been wanting to do that to you since I saw you yesterday." AJ said as Ciara backed away from him. She had wanted him to kiss her. It was amazing, like no other kiss she had ever had before. "What? What are you thinking? Are you alright?" AJ asked. He was concerned by her non-reaction. She was thinking what to do next. Should she return with a kiss? She decided to go for it. She pushed him up against the wall and kissed him passionately. Hands begun to roam as they both got lost in the moment. They were both attracted to each other. They were at fourteen and they still were, now at twenty-six. After a few minutes, AJ stopped them.
"If we continue this, it could lead to something that I'm not sure either one of us wants to take lightly." AJ said.
"I'm not taking this lightly, AJ. I want you. Since the moment you came back into my life yesterday." Ciara replied. AJ managed to get away from the wall and her for a moment. He couldn't believe he had stopped their making out session. "Wait… you're right… you're right AJ… You just do something to me I can't explain." Ciara told him.
"Same goes for you with me. Listen, let's sit and talk. You've got all these emotions to deal with. I have a suggestion for you and I want you to consider it." AJ said and sat down on the chair across from the bed. Ciara sat down on the bed. Ready to listen.
"I propose that you enjoy this weekend with Rachel, me, and the guys and then afterwards, we both go see your mom. I'd like to see her again and she'd probably like to see me as well." AJ said. "You deserve some fun Ciara so let's have some, starting with shopping today. Let me show you how much more fashionable I've become." AJ smiled. Ciara melted but knew that she should confess the real reason why she felt she had to leave.
"AJ, I'm afraid." She looked away from him and tried not to cry.
"Afraid of what? Nothing can hurt you. I won't let it." AJ told her.
"I can't control these flashes of memory. The ones that cause me to zone out for a few minutes. I don't want anyone to think I'm strange." She admitted.
"Rachel and I will be with you and we don't think you're strange. There's nothing to fear." AJ said. He sat down on the floor in front of where she was sitting on the bed and took her hands in his. "Remember that day I asked you to go steady?" AJ said. Ciara nodded.

"What are they doing in there?" Rachel asked as she paced outside the hotel room door. The guys were lounging around the hall with her while they waited for Ciara or AJ to open the door and come out.
"I can't take much more of this. They both need us." Brian said.
"Right now, they need each other." Kevin stopped Brian from going for the door handle.

"You promised me that you would do whatever you could to protect me the best that you could and that we'd always be friends. I remember." Ciara smiled.
"And I still make that promise." AJ said, "So, let's go shopping." AJ made a silly face to get her to laugh. It worked.
"Okay, give me a few minutes to compose myself and I'll be ready to go." Ciara said as she froze for a moment as she remembered a flash from her thirteenth birthday party.
"…C?" AJ asked several times.
"See what I mean, AJ? The memories are so intense right now, I'm afraid to be around anyone." She told him.
"Don't worry about it. You'll be all right. Go ahead and clean up." AJ said. He knew that if they dwelled on these spells, it would just depress her more and he didn't like to see her depressed.

"Howie… what time do we have that meeting?" Kevin asked.
"Carson canceled it. Tara's got a flu bug so he wanted to stay home to take care of her." Howie explained. They were going to meet up with Carson later in the day to shoot some hoops while Brian and Nick hung up with AJ and the girls.

"How long have you guys been out here?" AJ said as he opened the door. He had heard noises from the other side so he decided to investigate.

"Rachel, I've got this funny feeling… I can't do this. Please… can't you get someone else? Take my brother with you." Ciara begged her best friend.
"What's wrong? Are you sick?" Rachel was concerned.
"I can't explain it… it's like a panic attack only different. I'm scared." Ciara admitted. There was a knock on the door.
"Excuse me, ladies… I need to ask you something." The producer that was talking with the Backstreet Boys earlier had interrupted them.
"Sure." The girls replied.
"Is something wrong?" Rachel asked.
"We don't know yet. Ciara, have you ever met any of the guys before?"
"Guys?" Ciara looked at Rachel, "What have you roped me into Rach?" Ciara asked.
"Ciara… it's me, AJ." AJ entered the room. Ciara looked at AJ and passed out cold.

"Oh my god! Someone get some water and a first aid kit!" Rachel went into nurse mode. Totally oblivious to AJ being there.
He knelt down on the other side of Ciara and began singing "Time After Time" (Cyndi Lauper) to her.
"Rachel?" Ciara said when she came to moments later.
"Right here. What the hell just happened?" Rachel asked as Ciara opened her eyes.
"Angel Eyes?" AJ asked.
"McLean…" Ciara cried as soon as she heard those two familiar words and the way AJ said them. She remembered… she finally remembered. She began to cry. AJ pulled her to him.
"Sssshhhhhhh, it's alright baby… everything's all right." AJ tried to calm her down.
"If you only knew…" she sobbed.
"I'll go tell Carson to announce the delay of the winner announcement for a few minutes." The producer said and ran out of the room.
Rachel and AJ helped Ciara back onto the couch.
"Are you all right? How's your head?" Rachel asked.
"I think I'm okay." Ciara replied, "I remember everything now… everything." Ciara told her.
"Ciara? It's really you?" AJ asked. Now it was his turn to cry.
"You asked me to be your girlfriend that day. The only thing that's changed is that we're older." Ciara told him. "That and I have my memory back. Momma's gonna be so thrilled."
"I have so many questions." AJ said.
"I know… me too…" Ciara asked.
"So, C… are you still mad about me dragging you down here?" Rachel jumped in.
"Oh, I'm sorry… AJ… this is my best friend Rachel… Rach… AJ McLean." Ciara said.
"Rachel, I hope you're not offended that we called off the announcement about the winner of the contest." AJ expressed his regret.
"Are you kidding… this is much better! If you only knew everything that has happened to Ciara since that accident. You'd be amazed." Rachel said.
"You don't know what a relief it is to see you alive again." AJ said. Ciara pulled him into a hug.
"You don't know what a relief it is to finally remember my life back then. But, could we not do this here??? I'm really not comfortable here." Ciara explained.
"What's going on back here?" Carson came into the back room to ask, the rest of the guys were behind him.
"MTV has inadvertently found an old, lost friend of mine Carson. Because of extenuating circumstances, I'm asking that we choose another winner. Ciara and Rachel are still going to have their weekend with us, but this way, the fans won't feel cheated." AJ said.
"Wait… AJ…" Brian started to say.
"He's right… it's only fair…" Howie said. Kevin and Nick agreed.
"Okay then… I'd better get back out on the set." Carson stated.
"We'll still come out and sing though Carson." AJ said before turning back to Ciara. "Don't go anywhere… we have a lot to discuss." AJ told Ciara. "And I'll introduce you to the guys later." He smiled. Ciara remembered his smile.

"So you remember everything?" Rachel said after everyone had cleared the room to give her and Ciara some privacy. Ciara took a deep breath.
"Yeah… everything." Ciara admitted and put her head in her hands and cried. The accident was so vivid and clear to her as if it had just happened. "I need to get out of here, Rachel… please… get me out of here." Ciara begged Rachel. She was crying.
"Calm down, Ciara… take some deep breaths… remember… I'm here… nothing can hurt you." Rachel explained.
Once Ciara calmed down, Rachel had her lay down on the couch and rest for a little bit. When the guys were done, they came back to the room the girls were in. Rachel met them at the door.
"I need to get her out of here… this is too much." Rachel said when AJ opened the door.
"Is she all right?" AJ asked. Rachel pushed them back out the door.
"I can't say that. All I know is that for as long as I've known her, she has never remembered the first fourteen years of her life. Now, eleven years later, the memories are back and they're overwhelming." Rachel explained.
"Where will you go?" AJ asked.
"Well, my car is currently on it's way to her folks house, so right now, I'm not sure." Rachel admitted.
"We can take you both back to the hotel?" Brian suggested.
"Rachel?" Ciara called out.
"Yeah C."
"It's all right, they can come in. As long as they don't mind a flustered female." Ciara said as she sat up.
"Actually, I kinda love it." AJ said, getting Ciara to smile for him.
"C, the guys offered to take us back to their hotel." Rachel explained after the guys introduced themselves.
"Well, since we're here and all…" Ciara replied, "I mean, I know who you guys are and all and I'm a big fan of your music, I've just had…"
"A traumatic experience in your life that led you away from me but now we found each other again." AJ butted in.
"Why don't we all pile into the limousine and figure out what to do from there?" Kevin suggested. Everyone agreed.
"Hey guys… thanks for coming out and doing that about the contest thing… we were wondering if you'd do a segment on why another winner will be chosen." Carson asked the gang as they were walking out.
"Can you give us a few days Carson? Please?" AJ asked.
"Sure… anything for you guys." Carson replied and let the gang pass by him.

"Okay, everyone wants to know what's going on here? How do you two know each other?" Nick asked AJ and Ciara once everyone was in the limousine.
"I know you want answers… I know all of you want answers…" Ciara began, "But please, don't ask for them right now… If you only knew what I'm going through, you'd understand." She was looking at AJ the entire time.
"Let me tell you what I know, okay?" AJ suggested. Ciara nodded. "Ciara and I grew up together. We had just finished the eighth grade and were on our way home from a weekend of camping with her parents and older brother when we were hit by a dump truck. When I came to in the hospital, I was told that Ciara had died and so had her father." AJ was crying.
"For the past 11 years I had not remembered the first fourteen years of my life. I was hurt pretty bad. In a coma for six months. The doctors all told me that my memory may never come back, but they also said that someone or something could trigger it back."
"So you're okay now? You remember?" AJ asked.
"Yeah, thanks to you AJ. But my mom and step-dad and brothers don't know that I have my memory back." She told him.
"I think you should call them then." AJ handed her his cell phone.
"When I have a few minutes alone, I will. So… you became a member of a famous group, eh?" Ciara tried not to break down in tears. She was so relieved that she had her memory back.
"Yeah… it's been amazing. What do you do?" AJ asked.
"So guys, what's the plan for tonight?" Ciara changed the subject. She was feeling closed in. She didn't like to talk about herself, nor was she ready to.
"Well, we thought we'd take the two of you to our show at Madison Square Garden and then you'd come with us for the weekend. We'd hang out, you'd get to ask us questions, see us at our best and worst and we'd all have a great time." Kevin explained.
"Sounds like a good time to me, right Rachel?" Ciara asked looking at her friend. Rachel was observing Ciara from across the limousine.
"Yeah… you okay?" Rachel asked.
"I'm getting there, Rach… I'm getting there." Ciara admitted.

When they arrived at Madison Square Garden, they were all rushed into one of the backstage offices. The guys would be doing sound check and then a meet and greet with fans but had a few minutes before all of that was scheduled to begin.
"Ciara, you should call your mom. Tell her what's happened." Rachel suggested.
"Yes, I should." Ciara agreed.
"Well, we have to go do sound check. Just come out when you're done, okay?" Brian suggested as he, Nick, Howie, and Kevin walked by the girls. Ciara nodded.
"I'm going to go with them now, okay?" Rachel asked as Brian came back and took her hand to lead her away. Rachel and Ciara giggled.
"AJ, you ok?" Ciara asked AJ.
"No, I have a lot of questions that need answers and I'm really angry at our families for telling me you died. But my answers can wait. I don't want you to make this call alone." AJ said, "Ciara, do you remember that last day by the river when we were suppose to be collecting branches?" AJ asked.
"Now I do, as if it were yesterday." Ciara replied.
"I made a promise to you then that I didn't get to carry through and no matter where our lives lead us, I'm going to keep that promise starting now. I'm your friend and I still care about you." AJ put his hand on her arm.
"Thanks AJ. Let's get this phone call over with." Ciara said. AJ handed her his cell phone. She dialed her mom's.
"Hello?" Ciara's step-father answered the phone.
"Hi daddy, is mom around?" Ciara asked.
"Just a second…" her step-father replied. Ciara heard the phone change hands.
"Ciara… honey? Everything alright?" her mom asked.
"Momma… I've remembered everything." Ciara began crying.
"When? How? Really?" Ciara's mom began to cry on the other end of the phone. AJ took the phone from Ciara.
"Mrs. B?" AJ asked into the phone.
"Oh my… no one's called me that in years… AJ?"
"Yes, it's me."
"I should have known you'd be the one to help her. I should have known." Ciara's mom replied.
"I'll take care of her Mrs. B… don't you worry." AJ said and gave the phone back to Ciara. She had managed to calm herself down.
"Momma…"
"Was that really our AJ?"
"Yes momma… it was. Will you tell Jarod and daddy for me?" Ciara asked.
"I will. We'll see you when you get back, right?"
"Yes momma… I promise." Ciara said. AJ handed her a box of tissues he had found in the room.
"Call me if you want to talk later." Ciara's mom said and then hung up the phone.
"She didn't want to talk more?" AJ asked.
"No… and that's odd. She usually keeps me on the phone for an hour at a time." Ciara admitted as she handed him back the phone.
"C'mon, we're late for sound check." AJ said and offered her his hand. He made a mental note to discuss this later with her.
One of the Grips outfitted AJ with his microphones and such while another led Ciara down in front of the stage. There were some fans there that had won the change to be at sound check and such but were kept away from Rachel and Ciara by security.

"Time… look where we are and what we've been through… time… sharing our…" AJ sang. He broke down in tears. "Guys, I can't sing this song… excuse me…" AJ said and for the first time in eight years, bolted from the stage. Ciara looked from where he bolted to the guys to Rachel back to the guys. Brian went to go after him.
"No… let me go." Ciara blurted out. Brian nodded and a security guy went backstage with her. Some of the hands had shown her where AJ went. She found him in the guys' dressing room crouched in a corner crying.
Ciara went to him and held him and let him cry. They were both holding everything they were feeling inside and they weren't sure how to talk to each other as adults.
"We haven't done this since we were kids, only then, you would be the one holding me." Ciara spoke softly to AJ. He started to chuckle.
"Those were the days, young teenagers without a care in the world. Having fun." AJ said.
"Speaking of fun… when I saw you out on that stage, you were having a lot of fun until you began singing Time. Go out there and finish sound check. What's done is done, we can't go back and change it. You and me, we'll talk tonight after the show. All night if need be. But you've got thousands of fans coming to see you and probably a few hundred waiting for you at the meet and greet. We just found each other again, I just found me again. Finally, after all these years of not being sure who I was exactly, I found me again. And I have you to thank for it. Go back out there and do what makes you happy… sing." Ciara gave AJ a pep talk.
"I always loved that about you when we were growing up. You were so inspirational." AJ looked at her in amazement.
"We can't get into this now, AJ… you've got a show to do and thousands of screaming girls waiting for you. And I need to go talk to Rachel. I'm sure she's loving all the attention from the other guys, but I have some explaining to do." Ciara told him.
"Yeah, you're right… as usual. Man, I feel like I'm a kid again."
"AJ?" Brian knocked on the door. A half hour had passed and they really needed him back on stage to finish sound check.
"Coming." AJ replied, "Thanks for coming after me… that song has taken on a new meaning. Don't be surprised if I cry through it tonight, ok?" AJ asked.
"Don't be surprised if I cry the entire night. The Backstreet Boys are one of my favorite groups!" Ciara replied and gave him a smile.
"I'm glad you're here Ciara… I've missed you." AJ said and gave her a hug.
"Me too, AJ… me too."
"AJ!" Brian knocked on the door.
"Let's get you back out there before the calvary knocks the door down." Ciara giggled.

"Sorry Brian… I needed a few minutes." AJ said when he opened the door.
"Kinda figured that… you okay? Can we finish sound check and the meet and greet?" Brian asked.
"Yeah, I can do this." AJ said, turning to look at Ciara. "I can do just about anything now." AJ smiled at Ciara.

"Everything alright?" Rachel asked when Ciara joined her out in front of the stage and Brian and AJ re-joined the guys and the band on stage to finish sound check.
"It's getting there, Rachel… it's finally getting there." Ciara admitted.
"So are you glad I dragged you away for the weekend?" Rachel smiled.
"I'm thrilled. What about you, are you having a good time?"
"The guys couldn't be nicer. I'm having a great time. I'm really liking Brian. He's so down to earth." Rachel replied.
"Okay, guys… we want to test the trap doors now. Let's do The Call," the stage manager said over the loudspeakers.

"What about you? You're mind must be on overload. You look flushed." Rachel commented.
"I could use some quiet time…" Ciara admitted.
"I'm sure that can be arranged. Don't worry… but hey, this weekend is turning out to be much better then we could ever have imagined!"
"Yes, thanks to you winning the contest. What contest did you win anyway?" Ciara asked.
It was just a supply your name, email address and age into a contest thingy for a weekend with The Backstreet Boys… so I did and I won and I dragged you with me." Both girls laughed.

"Hey… aren't you C.B. Taylor?" one of the girls that were there from sound check yelled over to Ciara and Rachel as they were talking. The guys were up on stage making sure that the trap doors were set correctly before doing the last verse and chorus of the song to test them out. AJ looked to Ciara. She winked at him before going over to the fans.
"Hey ladies… how are you today?" Ciara responded to them.
"Oh my god, I can't believe it's you. You're as beautiful as the picture on the back of your books." One of the girls replied.
"So you like my books?" Ciara asked. The girls were all giggly.
"I thought you'd be older." One of the girls shouted.
"Thank you for that remark." Ciara replied.
"Can I get your autograph?" the first girl who called Ciara out asked.
"Sure… I guess that would be alright." Ciara replied, "Can I sign your memory bag?" she noticed that some of the girls had decorated some tote bags.
"I would love that!" the first girl squealed."

"Hey AJ, looks like Ciara is a celebrity in her own right." Nick said.
"What, you guys didn't know?" one of the female dancers said. All five guys turned to look at her. "C. B. Taylor writes novels. She's famous with the teenagers and twenty something set."
"You're kidding." Brian said.
"And she also goes to high schools and talks about the effects of alcohol on teenagers. Her step-brother died because he drank too much at a frat party." AJ was getting angry.
"Don't you have something else to do rather than gossip about others?" AJ said to the dancer. She whimpered away.
"AJ, take it easy. You've only just found out she was still alive a few hours ago. There's a lot you both still don't know about the other." Kevin offered.
"I know… and I respect Ciara's privacy… I just wish others would do the same."
"Well, it's over and done with."

"So you like The Backstreet Boys?" another girl asked.
"Yeah, they're pretty cool. This is my first concert though." Ciara admitted as she signed autographs.
"Oh my god, here comes AJ McLean!" one of the girls gasped.
"Hi everyone… we're about to head over to do the meet and greet." AJ said as the girls screamed. Ciara and Rachel laughed.
"Bye ladies… have fun tonight!" Ciara and Rachel waved to the girls as AJ and security led them backstage.

"That was strange, but fun." Ciara admitted when they had joined the guys.
"Okay, I'm curious." Nick blurted out. "We know that Rachel is a nurse, but Ciara… what do you do?"
"I'm a bum, Nick. Those girls were just my fan club." Ciara couldn't help but laugh.
"It's good to see you haven't lost your sense of humor." AJ admitted to her. "One of the dancers told us that you're a writer and that you also go around and talk about alcohol to teens."
"Yeah… I like doing that." Ciara admitted.
"You're so humble, C… tell them everything and why you do it." Rachel pushed.
"I had an older step-brother that died at a Frat party when I was sixteen years old from alcohol poisoning. He was only nineteen years old. He was rushing the frat and succumbed to peer pressure. I wrote a long letter about my feelings and such instead of talking to a counselor. Rachel here found it and erased the names and gave it to the local newspaper and they published it. That letter got me a full scholarship to Temple University in Philadelphia. But because of the interest in that letter, I was energized to get the facts out to teenagers and college students. I've toured the Eastern coast of the U.S. an have given conferences to other schools all over the country since I was seventeen. In college, I began writing a series of "a day in the life" stories and again, Rachel and my mom and step-dad and one of my professors stepped in and those got published and then I just started writing novels about whatever was on my mind and they sold and whalaaa… here I am today… memory back and all and things are a little strange." She explained.
"Wow…" the guys were all mesmerized.
"Time for the meet and greet guys!" their manager yelled from a door.
"Wanna come?" Howie asked the girls. Ciara shook her head.
"I need to make some calls, but Rachel you go ahead." Ciara encouraged her girlfriend. AJ waved over a security guard and an assistant.
"Nancy, can you find an office for Ciara to finish some phone calls, and Charlie… don't let Ciara out of your sight." AJ gave instructions before turning to Ciara. "I'll find you after the meet and greet is over." AJ gave her a kiss on the cheek, shocking everyone around them.
"You sure?" Rachel asked Ciara. Ciara nodded.
"Yeah, I need to call Jarod and the twins. Especially Jarod. He's been wanting this as much as I have. Momma was too upset earlier. I don't think she's called him yet."
"Okay, page me if you need me though… I'll put it on vibrate." Rachel said. The girls hugged.

Ciara called her brother once she was settled in an office.
"Hello?"
"Jarod… where are you?" Ciara asked.
"C… everything okay?" her brother asked.
"Everything's fine, double J." she replied instinctively.
"You haven't called me that since we were little."
"I know, Jarod… I remember." Ciara told him.
"You remember … everything?" Jarod said, choking back tears.
"Don't start `cause then I'll start and we'll both be a mess."
"How… when???" Jarod began to question.
"Let's just say that seeing an old friend helped me."
"You saw AJ?" Jarod said.
"You know?"
"I know that he's in that group, The Backstreet Boys. I've been hoping you two would find a way back to each other for several years now."
"J... I know that momma never kept you in the loop about what the doctors had given my prognosis for my memory so don't worry, I'm not mad at you. But, does momma know about AJ?"
"What do you mean?"
"His family and our family told him that I died in that accident, Jarod."
"Do you want me to turn around and come back? Aren't they performing at Madison Square Garden tonight?"
"No J… Susie is expecting you home. I'm okay, I just wanted you to know that. Momma's not very good at communicating things between you and I. Rach is with me and AJ and I have a lot to catch up on."
"Okay, well, if you're sure." Jarod said, being the protective big brother. Ciara giggled.
"I'm sure and I know where to reach you and how to reach you if I need you. I love you, ya know." Ciara said.
"I love you too and I'm very happy that you have your memory back. Very happy."
"Give my love to Susie and the kids."
"You bet. Call me if you need me. Bye." Jarod said and hung up the phone. Ciara hung up with him and made a few more calls. She was still on the phone when AJ and Rachel found her.
"Chris… I have to go now… yeah… indefinitely… uh huh… thanks… I will… bye." Ciara finished her conversation and hung up the phone.
"How was the meet and greet?"
"Words out about you and who you are… we overheard several fans talking about you." Rachel explained.
"And they would point over to Rachel and wave at her and smile. It was funny and cute." AJ replied.
"Soooooooooooooo… now what?"
"Chow and then the guys and I usually warm up and hang out with the opening acts before we get into wardrobe and do the show. You hungry?" AJ asked. Ciara's stomach growled.
"I guess that answers your question." She laughed. AJ and Rachel joined in on the laughter.
"C'mon… let's go find the chow line." AJ suggested.
"Wait… AJ… could you sing me the song again?" Ciara asked. AJ looked at her sideways. She wanted him to sing Time After Time to her.
"Um… uh…" AJ turned red. He was blushing. He had always sung that song when he was thinking about her and now that she was right in front of him, he didn't know if he could.
"Just a little bit… please?"

AJ's voice cracked just a little as he began to sing… he closed his eyes and sang his heart out to that song for her.

Lying in my bed I hear the clock tick,
And think of you
Caught up in circles confusion--
Is nothing new
Flashback--warm nights--
Almost left behind
Suitcases of memories,
Time after--

Sometimes you picture me--
I'm walking too far ahead
You're calling to me, I can't hear
What you've said--
Then you say--go slow--
I fall behind--
The second hand unwinds

Chorus:
If you're lost you can look--and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you--I'll be waiting
Time after time

After my picture fades and darkness has
Turned to gray
Watching through windows--you're wondering
If I'm OK
Secrets stolen from deep inside
The drum beats out of time--

Chorus:
If you're lost...

You said go slow--
I fall behind
The second hand unwinds--

Chorus:
If you're lost...
...Time after time
Time after time
Time after time
Time after time
© 1983 Rellla Music Co. (BMI) and Dub Notes (ASCAP)
All Rights Reserved

Written by Cyndi Lauper, Rob Hyman
Produced by Rick Chertoff
Executive Producer: Lennie Petze
Associate Producer: William Wittman
Engineered by William Wittman
Arranged by Cyndi Lauper, Rick Chertoff, Rob Hyman, Eric Bazilian

"Even better than I remember, AJ… even better." Ciara said when AJ was finished. Rachel applauded.
"Every time I heard that song or would sing that song, I'd think of you." AJ told her.
"Chow time guys! Let's go!" Nick interrupted the trio.
"Gee Nick… hungry?" Rachel teased. Nick looked her up and down.
"Yes I am, but there's no time for that now, but we could make time for that…"
"Carter…" AJ warned.
"Oh… you mean consumable food…" Nick laughed, "Sorry… where are my manners."
"You actually have some?" Rachel replied.
"You tell him, Rachel!" AJ chuckled. "Lead on, Nick…" AJ said. He and the girls followed Nick to the chow room.

"Brian? Can I ask you something?" Ciara asked as she, Rachel, and the guys were finishing up their dinner.
"Sure." Brian replied.
"Do you believe that a child of the lord can go to the wayside for years at a time when they think that he and his father have caused that child pain?" Ciara asked.
"I believe that whatever happens, happens to make us stronger people. God doesn't do something to hurt us or make us sad. He does it to make us stronger."
"Like with your heart?" Rachel chimed in.
"Yes… exactly. I'm a better person for it. I like to think that I'm a more compassionate person, more caring and loving and understanding." Brian explained. "Ciara, what I do know is that God loves all of us, no matter what and he knows the trials and tribulations we all go through, individually and collectively. Now, I don't know you all that well, but what I do know is that you are a very strong woman with a strong spirit and soul. Don't go second guessing yourself or your decisions in your life." Brian said.
"You'll have to forgive Brian… once someone gets him started on religion, it's hard for him to back off." Kevin said.
"It's alright. Sometimes you need to hear and objective point of view of things to help see things clearly." Ciara replied.
"You're good people, Ciara and Rachel. Good people. It's nice to meet fans like you." Howie told them.
"Yeah… you're grounded, friendly, personable, thinkers, and great senses of humor and you don't back down from us." Nick chimed in.
"And don't intimidate us." Kevin said.
"You get intimidated by fans?" Rachel asked Kevin.
"Sometimes. When there are so many fans and the screaming is so loud where you can't even think to yourself, it gets scary." Brian explained.
"It humbles us." AJ stated.
"So… do either of you have a favorite song of ours?" Kevin asked.
"Perfect Fan." Both girls said unanimously.
"Really?" all five guys asked.
"It's beautiful." Ciara said. Rachel nodded.
"Actually it's a tie between that one and What Makes You Different, Makes You Beautiful." Rachel added.
"Ah, import shoppers." AJ smiled.
"Yup and Wal*Mart." The girls answered. Everyone laughed.
"This is your first Backstreet concert, right?" Howie asked them.
"Yup… schedules and work load didn't really allow us any other time. When I found out I won, I gave the ticket I had bought to a friend and her daughter." Rachel explained.
"Cool. What do you guys thing about today so far?" Nick asked.
"Eventful and memorable." Ciara answered without hesitation and then laughed when she realized what she had said. "Memorable." She chuckled. AJ touched her shoulder. She lifted her eyes and tilted her head a little to look at him. "I'm alright. You alright?" she asked.
"Better than ever." AJ replied.

Rachel, Ciara, and the guys talked for a little while longer while the opening acts were on stage. The stage manager finally pulled the guys away from the girls and the guys went off to get ready for the show. Security showed Ciara and Rachel to their seats in the front row of the concert.
Rachel and Ciara cried the entire show. AJ cried during the performance of Time. He had placed himself in front of Ciara for the entire song and sang only to her. The teenage girls around Ciara and Rachel went nuts when AJ reached down to touch Ciara's cheek during "sharing our dreams… every little bit of life with you" towards the end of the song.

"Hey Rachel?" Ciara asked her best friend. They were in Rachel's car heading somewhere. Ciara didn't know where. All Rachel had said when she had called two hours earlier was "pack a bag for warm weather, make sure you bring your sexy black dress, we're going away for a few days".

"Yeah, C?" Rachel was driving and was trying not to show her excitement about where they were going. She had to keep it a secret for just a little while longer. Rachel had won a contest on MTV. The prize was to spend a weekend with the Backstreet Boys at an undisclosed location. Rachel was so psyched. She and Ciara loved their music and Ciara and AJ were friends back in school, but hadn't seen each other in years. Rachel was so excited. She needed to get Ciara away from New York for a few days. She needed to get away. They were both so involved in work that they hardly had any fun anymore let alone date anyone. Ciara would get so wrapped up in writing that there would be days where she wouldn't talk to anyone because she'd forget about everyone and everything. If it weren't for Rachel, she'd probably forget to eat anything too. Rachel, on the other hand, loved working as a nurse. She felt good helping others.

"You never did tell me where we're going? And why are we in Times Square?" Ciara asked Rachel.
Rachel had called Ciara's brother to meet them at the MTV Studios so that he could drive her car back to their parents' house for the week.

"You'll see… where's my cell phone?" Rachel asked as she reached for her purse. Ciara pulled it out of the glove compartment.

"Where I put it when I got in the car." Ciara pulled out the phone and handed it to Rachel.

Ciara had to admit, she was a little excited, yet nervous. Rachel was always doing things on the spare of the moment and dragged Ciara with her. Ciara was nearly finished with her newest novel and although she was way ahead of scheduled, she wanted to finish it. When she got involved in her writing, she fell in love with the characters and hated to be away from them if she wasn't finished with their story. But, she had been neglecting her friend and herself for that matter. She knew it and she knew that Rachel was just doing what was best for them both. They both hadn't been the same since the accident. Rachel was the one who seemed to be moving on and getting on with life.
*******************************************************************

"Ciara Bryar… why is that name so familiar?" AJ asked as he and the guys were being briefed on their upcoming weekend.

"An old conquest maybe?" Nick snickered from across the room.

"Nah, man… this is different. I use to know a Ciara, this can't be the same girl I knew way back when, could it?" AJ wondered. He used to have a crush on a girl named Ciara when he was growing up.

"Don't sweat it, AJ. It's probably some teeny bopper." Kevin teased. The guys were all sitting in a dressing room waiting to go out on the TRL stage.
***************************************************************************************************

"Remember how we both have stated on occasion that it would be nice to get away somewhere for a great weekend?" Rachel asked Ciara after she drove up to the valet. There was a TV crew waiting for them as soon as the car stopped.

"Okay, what did you do?" Ciara asked.

"We're in for the time of our lives. That's all I'm gonna say. You're gonna be shocked when you find out everything." Rachel replied. Ciara trusted her friend so she went along with this little joyride of hers.
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"Guys, they're here. Now… even though Rachel won the contest, her friend doesn't know what's going on at all so we're going to keep earphones on them until we're ready to bring them on stage." A producer was explaining, shortly before TRL was to go on the air.

"Ambush a fan, eh?" Howie asked the producer.

"Sorta. These two are 26 years old."

"Uh oh… Nick's age!" AJ teased and then realized that that was how old Ciara would be about now.

"AJ? Are you ok?" Kevin asked. AJ's smile turned into a serious look.

"Is there any way we could see the girls without them seeing us? Do you have a camera in there with them?" AJ questioned.

"Sure. Follow me," the producer led them to the control room.

"That can't be her." AJ said out loud as soon as he saw Ciara's green eyes and her smile.

"What? You know them?" the producer asked.

"I may know the young woman in the blue jeans and the white button down shirt. But it's impossible. I was told she was dead." AJ left the room. Kevin went after him.

"AJ, what's wrong?" Kevin asked when he found him up on the roof.

"Remember that accident I was involved in before we all hooked up?" AJ asked. Kevin nodded.

"Yeah… you had gone to a water park with some friends and their parents. Their daughter was killed. They moved away."

"That daughter is downstairs. She's right downstairs. I can't go through with this. She was my best friend, Kevin. My best friend before all of you. I had asked her to be my girl that day." AJ admitted.

"That's why you listen to `Last Kiss' a lot, right?" Kevin asked. AJ nodded, tears falling freely from his face.

"We could ask MTV to postpone this?"

"No, we promised we'd do this, we signed to do this. Maybe it's not her?" AJ stated.

"Are you sure you can do this?" Kevin asked him. AJ nodded.
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This first post it to introduce you to this blog.

This blog is for my craving of AJ McLean. It is a Fan Fiction blog and right now, I'm the only writer of this particular blog. If you have any comments, ideas, suggestions, remarks, feedback, please send them to me at stories@iwuvjoey.com with TIME in the subject line.

Thank you.

Tammtamm